Monday, February 27, 2012

Need to Get Me Some Tail

***Hi, Dad.  This might be a blog you'll want to skip.  Fair warning.***

One of my other widow friends tells me that after awhile, when people began to ask her how she was doing, she would say, “Well, I really need to get laid.  It’s been so long since I’ve had sex, they haven’t changed it, have they?”

Yep, I completely get that.  Never one to shy from talking about sex, my friends and I joke about this regularly.

It’s begun to feel like the whole universe knows about my “needs” as well, and that I’m being teased.

Last week, my bestie had just returned from a trip to LA.  We were doing the "de-brief", and she was telling me about two of her purchases.  One was a new android phone that has the capability to speak into it and it sends a text.  The other was a new set of eyelash extensions (and they look amazing).

Eyelash extensions are the hot new trend in LA.  They’re not just the stick-on kind that your grandmother bought at Walgreens.  You get them permanently adhered to your own eyelashes by an esthetician.  They last for roughly a month.

She was trying to convince me that I needed some extensions of my own (but, some people genetically are tall and skinny, I unfortunately, didn’t get those genes, but I did get my own set of long eyelashes so I don’t need extensions... Dad, if you're still reading this, "Thanks for the eyelashes.").  She texted me a photo of hers.  I replied, “Wow.  Amazing.”  Then she was trying to text me, “Let's figure out who does them (in Denver) and get you some, too.”  Instead, her phone sent this.

Hahahaha!  Even her phone knows I need to get some.

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