Wednesday, October 17, 2012

A Vacation and a Wedding

I took a vacation! 

It had been awhile.  I went to Mexico.  I’ve gotten to the point where I feel that I’m not on vacation if it’s not the beach.  I get teased occasionally about my vacation choice, as I’m not actually an ocean lover in the true sense of the word.  I don’t get in above my knees.  I’m scared.  This is totally something that I want to overcome, but every time I think, “Ok, you can do this. Here we go.”  I get in just above my knees and I start to hyperventilate.  So, I’ll try again next time.  In the meantime, I lay on a chair in the shade, reading a delightful book, listening to the waves, when I get hot I go dip in the pool, and someone brings me drinks all day.  Swimming in the ocean or not, if that doesn’t sound like a vacation to you, then, you crazy.

This was my hangout...

When I returned from the girls’ trip to Mexico, I went to my third wedding since Sawan died.  The good news is that they are getting easier.  The bad news is, they’re still hard. 

This was the wedding of a good friend from my hometown that I’ve known forever, but also someone that Sawan spent a lot of time with after we got married, so it was just a difficult one for me.  I spent the day reflecting on what Sawan would have said to him on that day.  He loved being married to me.  It didn’t feel right that he wasn’t there to celebrate with his buddy.  It doesn’t feel right that he never got to meet the bride.

I only lightly shed tears throughout the ceremony.  I totally kept it together.  Then, I had to sign the card.  Still, I kept it together, but I knew that I was falling apart, so I hightailed it to the bathroom so that I could ugly cry if I needed to.

When I got there, and totally collapsed into sobs, they had these awesome stalls that didn’t show the feet, so I knew that even if someone came in and heard me, I could wait it out and they would never know who had been in there.

This is precisely what happened.  The stranger in the stall next to me sweetly asked, “Are you ok?” 

I nearly started laughing, because all I could think of to say was, “Um, there’s *hiccup* no toilet paper.”

I thought better of it, lied that I was just great and waited it out, as planned.

After I got my ugly cry out, though, I was able to mostly enjoy the rest of the time.  I am truly so happy for the sweet couple.
As we got ready to pose for the photo, Cori said, "I guess I didn't get the memo to wear black."  I said, "I know, LBJ."  She says she doesn't know what LBJ means.  "You know, Little Black Dress."  She's like, "That's LBD."  LBJ would be Lyndon B Johnson.  Much hilarity insued.
And after we recovered, the boring posed shot.

So, that should update you to almost the end of August!  Stay tuned for my first tattoo!

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