Saturday, October 30, 2010

Our First Date

This week marks the fifth anniversary of our first date.

Believe it or not, we still celebrated it.  It was more an excuse to go out to dinner than anything else, but also, we were one of those couples that kinda made you want to throw up a little in your mouth.  I actually knew this and so I tried to rein it in a bit whenever we were around people.  Tried to actually call him by his name sometimes instead of just “baby.”

October 30, 2005 was the date.  We spent all week on the phone with each other, and I had already pretty much fallen head over heels.  I had met him and worked with him briefly six months before.  So when I showed up for coffee on that Sunday, at Stella’s on Pearl Street, and he opened the door for me, honestly my first impression was “oh, shit.”

He looked nothing like I remembered.  He was dressed in a white mock turtleneck (you know those ones that they had at Abercrombie and Fitch that were really cool circa 1995?) with tapered jeans and dark shoes and white socks.  Plus he had this weird haircut that made him look like he just had a really big round head.  (I suppose it’s a good thing he’s not around now to have his feelings hurt by what I’m writing about him.)

But it didn’t matter.  That stuff never really does.  Plus, underneath all that stuff was an incredibly handsome man, and it took about a minute flat for him to change his style of dressing to suit me and about 3 weeks for his hair to grow long enough for me to be able to cut it for him, so he was a new man.

After the first impression bit was over, it was the usual delightful awkwardness of first dates.  It’s just coffee, so who pays?  He did.  Then we went and walked around.  It was Halloween, so there were lots of cute kiddos in costumes, and we did lots of fun people watching.  We drank our coffee outside and listened to the guys playing live music.  One of my clearest memories of the day was the band covered the Damien Rice song “Can’t take my eyes off of you” and every time I looked up at him I met his gaze.  He was just watching me, couldn’t take his eyes off of me.  He made me feel so beautiful.

It was a short date.  He had to go into work that night.  So he walked me to my car.  I had bought green chili from the Farmer’s Market and he carried them for me.  We got to the car and the whole way I was wondering if he was going to kiss me.  I had been on so many dates lately where I had felt, I don’t know, “used” I guess, so I was wanting him to, but also hoping he wouldn’t.  He just sweetly swallowed me up in the best hug I’d ever had and then opened my car door for me and asked if he could see me later this week.  I said, “Yes, please.”  (Which he later told me he thought was the cutest response, ever.)  And the rest is history.


  1. Noie
    I want you to know that I have read all of your blogs at least 3 times and they have really touched me. Your honesty and openness is a wondeful tonic and I so much appreciate them.

    Diane Clarida - your Clydesdale friend (do you remember that)

  2. Noel,
    What a brave and amazing journey you are on! And what a wonderful way to share this amazing man and the love you had for each other with the world. I think of you (and Sawan) often, and hope you are finding healing and peace.
    Amy Prosseda

  3. So sweet! Off to a great start with this portion of your writing project(s)!


  4. @Diane...You are so sweet! It's so fun to see you on here! Hope all is well with you, and of course I remember, how loud can you NAY?

    @Amy...I think of you often, too, and wonder how you are. I heard that the man you're dating knew Sawan somehow...I would love to hear that story, plus all about how you guys met and stuff. You seem happy (via facebook) and that makes me glad! We should get together sometime!

    @April...Thanks for your encouragement, plus, did you feel like you were the unspoken "star" of the "Texas Widow" one? B/C talking to you helped me to wrestle through so much of that and I wrote it the next day, just didn't post it 'till recently...xoxo